"Yes, Dear"
"Em, right here. This should be great Clara can sit next to you and I'll sit next to Jacob. How's that?" He asked.
"Er... if it's all right with you Mr Pike, I'd kinda like to sit next to Clara." Jacob replied politely but firmly. After the Anaesthesia incursion, he thought it politic to play the devoted husband angle up to the hilt. The truth was, though, it wasn't the catty Miss Orr he was interested in. Much to his discomfit, it was his wife's hired help, Miss Straub, that he kept having to drag his eyes away from. She looked absolutely stunning tonight in that blue dress from Pettigrew's. By an act of will he kept his eyes on his wife and mother of their daughter whom he loved, cherished and obeyed with all his heart.
But boy, Miss Straub in that dress!
"How very dare you?! Of course it's my natural hair color!"
When everybody was seated, the house lamps were turned low and the lime lights which illuminated the stage were lit (the stage was perhaps small by New York standards, but large for the territorial sticks, and as big as anything in Helena or the now burned down theatre in Virginia City).
An expectant hush fell on the audience which was suddenly shattered by an explosive BANG!!! which was amplified by sounding in a silent room. There was a big puff of sulphureous yellow smoke at the front of the stage and who should step through the resultant mist? It was the fellow many people feared more than anyone else in the world - especially those who had a sneaking suspicion that there was something sinful in their attending this performance, or, for that matter, the theatre, period.
"I AM LUCIFER!!!" Mr Darling's stentorian voice fair shook the room to the rafters - which might have explained why there was a noise above of someone scrabbling not to fall out of them.
Deep, minor-chords played on the hidden piano and there was a woman's scream from the audience (or was it just one of the actresses behind a curtain?) as Old Nick himself stepped forward. Mr Darling had always had qualms at this point when they'd performed this on tour that some religious member of the audience might take a pot shot at him with a six-shooter.
"GOD HATH CREATED MAN, AND PLACED HIM IN AN EARTHLY PARADISE, AND THERE HE IS HAPPY!" (Mr Darling always declaimed in capital letters!)
"BUT LO, THE LORD HIMSELF HATH DONE MY WORK FOR ME AND CREATED THAT WHICH WILL BE HIS DOWNFALL... WOMAN!!"
There was another loud bang and more smoke and as it cleared the stage had been set with a painted backcloth of a wooded forest and two 2-dimentional prop bushes. Behind one was an apparently naked man, the wood and canvas prop covering any unseemly parts of his anatomy, of course. He was a handsome, muscular Adam, and there was a creaking noise as Sally Cutts, for one, leaned forward in her chair.
The Father of Mankind rubbed his side.
"Nice day in Eden" Mr Astin sighed "Ribs sure feel sore this mornin', though!"
This got a laugh from the more theologically astute members of the audience.
"The law is the law."
"Mining's not everyone's choice of hobbies, it just happens to be mine."
Now Speed Guyer was no Eastern prude by any stretch of the imagination. He was from New York, after all. Smiling at the sight of the 'supposed' naked Adam, and, he was beginning to worry just a bit about the appearance of Arabella Mudd as Eve. He leaned toward Alice, "This is sort of pushing things a bit, and if Arabella's made up anything like that poster of her, then we'll be called to shut down the play. Count on it."
"Yes, I agree," Alice responded in a like whisper. "The Ladies of Kalispell are here tonight, in force, with their husbands in tow, so there could be fireworks, then again, maybe not. With them, you can never tell. It's Granny Miggins we should worry about, she could start a riot over little to nothin'."
Speed nearly burst out laughing at the thought of Granny Miggins' reaction, even if Arabella and this Adam fellow, were in flesh-colored costumes.
"Every town needs a newspaper."
Two rows back from the stage sat Phineas McVay on the isle, pad, and pencil in hand as the play opened with the image of Lucifer. He actually was quite impressed with what they had opted to do, and, with the presentation of the opening scene, Edward Darling's booming articulation as the Devil himself.
Then, to his delight, was the second scene with the almost naked Adam, and that gave Phin a real shudder at the realization of what was to come next, the star of the show and the evening if it was not closed down ten minutes into the play, Arabella as Eve supposedly naked as well. This may well spell disaster, then again?
At Jacob's request, Emeline was sitting between Clara and Barnabas as they passed the short wait for the play to begin.
And begin it did! A bang, smoke, chaos! And then the Devil!
Despite herself, Emeline gasped and reached to grasp Barnabas' arm, giving it a tight squeeze. "Goodness!" she hissed, startled, but in a good way!
And then Adam appeared and she gasped again, demurely hiding her face against Barnabas' shoulder...although she was peeking!
Up in the rafters, Weedy had settled in comfortably beside Wyatt, although their seats were a bit precarious, but at least they had a good view of the stage, with no obstructions in their way.
While it was evident that the shindig was about to begin, Weedy was completely unprepared for the explosions and smoke -- and the Devil himself!
The boy jumped and had to scramble to keep his precarious seat, then, as the smoke cleared, he had to wonder if Satan was coming for them! He glanced at Wyatt, wide-eyed, relaxing only when the red-cloaked figure started to speak -- to the audience, and not them!
And then...was that man naked? There as a good sign that their boy-wishes might actually come true! Send in Eve!!
It was a good thing for Justus that the audience portion of the theater was relatively dark so that no one could see his cheeks go about as red as the Devil's costume when the nearly naked man appeared on stage!
Oh, sure, the man's criadillas were concealed by scenery, but the rest of 'Adam' appeared to be bare-skin naked, and while not nearly as risque as a lady in that state, it was still scandalous and embarrassing!
He glanced quickly at Constance, then closed his eyes, anticipating the arrival of Eve!
"Everybody can feather their nest, but it's not just anybody that can lay an egg!"
On stage, 'Adam' rubbed his ribs some more and then spoke again to himself in idle soliloquy.
"Say, I wonder if I'll see my friends today, Lenny the Lion, or his friend Larry the Lamb, or their pal Corny the Crocodile? But hark! I think I hear one of them coming now!"
There was a voice, clear as a bell, off stage.
"Adam? Oh Aaaaaaadam?! ADAM!! Where the heck are ya!" The Virginian accent was unmistakable. Off stage, Arabella did her usual trick of counting to three before she made her scheduled entrance onto the stage.
Then she walked on, and the star-struck Sally Cutts and a couple of bribed audience members set up a ripple of applause which others joined in with, in the sheeplike manner of audiences everywhere (a trait that could also work against an artist, to be fair - booing was also contagious!).
Arabella was supposed to be wearing a body stocking so cunningly contrived as to give the impression of total nudity, but perhaps she had made one of her last-minute 'artistic decisions' and gone on stark naked: only Mr Astin, on stage with her, and the boys in the rafters could really tell. From the audience's point of view, two large fake fern fronds covered her chest and pelvis, obscuring any clarity upon the matter.
The actress pretended to be shocked and embarrassed by the applause and looked abashed until it died down (it was probably the best bit of acting she did all night, by her own admission) at which point Adam exclaimed "Hey, you're not Corny!"
Arabella looked straight at the audience and confided in them "Well, that's not what Mr McVey says in his Theatre Reviews!" Then, 'Fourth Wall' duly demolished, she was back in role.
"I'm Eve, I'm your Missus. God just made me, and..." she suddenly halted in her speech and stared down, wide eyed, at Adam's below-the-waist area, hidden by his 'modesty shrub'. "... what the Dickens is THAT THING?!!!" and then down at herself "...and why haven't I got one?!"
After the audience calmed down, Adam held up a large prop piece of fruit. "It's called an Apple!" he informed Eve.
"Oooh! I want it, let me come over and get it..." she started out from behind her ferns but Adam held up his hand.
"No, I'll throw it!" he declared, throwing the thing so weakly that it landed plumb in the middle of the stage.
"This boy could get a job pitching for the Cincinnati Reds!" Eve told the audience, name dropping the nation’s worst performing baseball team of last year's season. "Guess I'll just have to come out and get it. Good job nobody's here to see me!" she muttered. Miss Hardy had taught her projection and how to mumble and mutter so that even the back row could hear you.
But then, magically, the apple, pulled on an invisible wire, started to move across the stage toward her. "Oh, it's Oh-Keh, it's rolling!" Arabella declared. Again, she broke the fourth wall by winking at the audience "Sorry gents!"
Of course Clara was more than willing to agree to sitting with Emeline and her husband, there were four seats available too next to each other, which helped. Jacob agreed to sit with the other couple but let Pronto know he'd prefer to sit next to his wife. Clara squeezed his hand, it was sweet of him to say that. With that they settled in and soon enough the performance began.
The show started with a bang. No, seriously a very loud bang which produced a whole bunch of smoke too. My lord! Clara's eyes went wide, not expecting that. And then emerged Satan, not the real one of course, nobody could be that credulous but Clara had to admit it was some top notch costuming and make up too. He sure was a booming speaker.
Clara glared though at the mention of women being the cause of man's downfall. Utter nonsense. But she reminded herself it was just a play.
Next came Adam. Well, no real costuming there. Clara eyed the young man's fine physique, she hoped Jacob wasn't bothered by it. He was gaunt in comparison to that fellow. Clara was fine with it though, she loved him as he was. She was amused by Adam's clever line about his ribs.
Next was the unmistakable sound of Arabella's twangy southern voice from off stage. Oh here it comes. Clara glanced at Jacob with a silent look of bemusement already. Sure enough.
Arabella was nude. Sure strategically positioned between fake prop leaves but there was no doubt the girl did not have a stitch of clothing on. She just knew it. Many in the town were going to be scandalized. Frankly Clara did not care. It would have never been her choice but then she could never have been an actress especially flaunting herself up there in public. She had her dignity.
Ara probably couldn't even spell the word let alone have it or care to have it!
"Every town needs a newspaper."
"Hey, you're not Corny!" Adam exclaimed.
Arabella looked straight at the audience and confided in them, "Well, that's not what Mr McVey says in his Theater Reviews!"
This caused Phin to stop writing in his version of shorthand, and look up to the stage, wondering what Arabella was talking about, as he had not written any reviews of her performances since last spring.
And that did a bit more than just fracture the ‘Fourth Wall,’ that invisible barer between the actress and the audience which one is not supposed to break, but it was Arabella after all, and she has that tendency to do as she pleases when constraints cannot be immediately applied.
Of course, it is not real, this 'Fourth Wall.' Some believe that to respect the audience is to recognize them as active participants in an act of the imagination. He had yet to meet a director of that ilk. Well then, his review was off to a fast start.
The body stockings were something new to the White Rose Theater stage. Not to mention the Kalispell audience in attendance. he leaned a bit foeard looking at Arabella, and at 'Adam' He could just make out the neckband on Adam, but either her makeup was better than Adam's or, "My God!" He whispered to himself.